Of Guns And Flowers And A Car Crash

On Wednesday just before lunchtime, somebody drove across my path in the middle of a roundabout (I had right of way). I barely had time to slam on my brakes before crashing with a sickening thud into the side of her car.  It was like slow motion, I could see it coming and there was absolutely nothing I could do to avoid her.

Neither of us injured thankfully, and yes it could have been worse, but…I’ve had my shiny new car for less than three months…

Poor Car Nov 2015 Edited

As it is, my blogging commitments have gone by the wayside these past couple of weeks for myriad reasons, but frustrating, time-sucking dealings with insurance companies and repair centres have set me back further still.  Please bear with me…

Not all for bad reasons though: one bright spark, or should I say three in the form of cake sparklers, was celebrating my middle son’s birthday in Brighton last weekend.  Eldest Son took this happy photo:

Nicky's Birthday Nov 2015

But then I think this world has gone crazy.  So crazy.

Another tragic shooting, this time in San Bernardino, California. And once again in the aftermath we are left to ask: Why?

I remember the day of the Columbine shootings, images etched on my mind as with a sharp knife.  Eldest Son was sixteen.  He walked home from school as normal, said Hi and headed straight for his room, anxious to check on his pet rat Blue who sadly had a tumour.

His father was home that day and together we sat glued to the television screen watching the live news unfold, of terrified high school students pouring out from their once safe school as police officers with firearms helped usher them away.  Away from their dead and dying friends left inside.

“Blue died,” my son said as he walked back into the living room. I turned away from the TV  and saw a tear slide down his cheek. I got up and walked over to him and hugged him and then looked down at the small, lifeless body of his pet rat resting in the palms of his gentle hands.

“I’m so sorry sweetheart, we’ll find a good place to bury her in the back…”

My son looked up then at the TV, wondering what his father was so engrossed in.  “There’s been a school shooting in Colorado, lots of kids killed,” he said without turning around.

That day on April 20, 1999 changed us forever.  After that, a police officer (already armed), patrolled my son’s high school every day which made me feel somewhat safer.   But a new kind of fear wormed its way into our family’s heart that day, as it did for millions of others.

There had been one or two school shootings before and those were bad enough, horrifying that kids could actually take guns and shoot other kids.  But the Columbine shootings ushered us into a new era, one that filled our collective psyche with trauma and fear for our children’s safety. After all, we asked, if they aren’t safe at school from their peers, where are they safe?

In all the school shootings that have happened since, the question still goes unanswered: what made these young men commit such appalling crimes?  We try to find answers so we blame violent video games; bullying; family break ups; drugs; alcohol; Asperger’s Syndrome; antidepressants; the internet; heavy metal music; black tee-shirts; girl problems. And Marylin Manson.

But what about the sickness that lies at the heart of our society that brings these young people to this murderous point of no return?  How can we cure that?  And how do we stop them from getting hold of weapons that are used for one thing and one thing only: killing people.

9/11 hadn’t happened when Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold walked into their school heavily armed with their own weapons of mass destruction.  The world is a different place since they had their day and their deaths and that of thirteen others.

It seems now that barely a few weeks or even days go by without news of yet another attack on innocent people in America be it in churches and cinemas, office buildings and Planned Parenthood,  schools and universities.

The aftershocks of 9/11 continue to rumble, exploding into carnage in hot spots throughout the world as recently as Beirut, Turkey and Paris, in street markets and cafes, bars and beaches, not forgetting the thirty British holidaymakers cruelly slaughtered while sunbathing in blissful relaxation on a beach in Tunisia.

My friend Ste J questions a certain silence no matter what our religion or beliefs in his excellent post written just days before the San Bernardino shootings.

The motives behind these attacks might be different, but the end results are the same: untold human suffering thanks to someone else’s final solution.

How do we protect our children from this madness?  What do we tell our loved ones when we are afraid and unable to answer our own questions?   We know there are no guarantees in life.  But we also know that we can’t let this madness destroy us. We fight back one day at a time, one heart at a time, one life at a time and we don’t give up.

And then I watched the video clip below posted by Luanne on her blog and who I thank so much friend for sharing. Made in the aftermath of the Paris attacks, though tragic that it should have been made at all,  it exudes heart-melting tenderness between a father and his son and of the redemptive power of love and trust and promise and innocence. It made me weep:

Maybe it is in this little boy’s smile at the end as he looks up at his father, his worries visibly easing, that helps us draw something hopeful and pure back into our hearts and breathe a little easier knowing that we and our children will make it.  We have to.

 

 

 

 

 

About Sherri Matthews

Sherri is a British writer working on her second memoir while seeking publication of her first. Her work has appeared in magazines, anthologies and online as well as long/shortlisted and special mentioned in contests. Once upon a time and for twenty years, she lived in California. Today, she lives in England with her human family, owned by two black cats.
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107 Responses to Of Guns And Flowers And A Car Crash

  1. Annika Perry says:

    Sherri, the video has me in tears. The purity and innocence is sublime – it really isn’t that difficult to be good to each other. I came to the decision that I will never comprehend people who carry out these atrocities – the sadness lingers, the disbelief is staggering. For us in the UK the American gun laws seem equally staggering, it makes such events so much easier. A deep sigh. Also, how are you after the accident?? That looks bad and I know the shock and whiplash can be really bad. Do take good care of yourself and give yourself time and space to fully recover. Hugs ❤️

    Liked by 1 person

    • Sherri says:

      Ahh…me too Annika, it is hard to watch and not shed tears isn’t it? And the tragedy is that it should have been made at all, but of course the world is full of human suffering, so much of which we hear so little. And thank you so much for your concern and hugs. I’m okay, but it was a shock at the time and for the next couple of days I had a few aches and pains but no whiplash thankfully, something I had before and would not wish on anyone. Hugs back 🙂 ❤

      Like

  2. I’m sure your heart is heavy for so many reasons. I remember when a cop totaled out my mother’s new car and I was just a teenager. It was his fault but it changed me in so many ways. I had the car full of little ones. I hope you weren’t badly shaken and I know that sound. It stays with you for a long while.
    As for the atrocities in the world, the more crowded we get and the more unwell people we have, the more these things will happen. I think they have always been with us but we weren’t so aware. Wars have been started by delusional people everywhere. People who want to cause mayhem because it’s in their souls, will find a weapon. They have used fire, acid, knives, bombs, anything they can get their hands on. I wish we could find ways to help them deal with the insanity that goes on in their minds. The flowers are more prolific than the guns. Love has to triumph over madness. It’s my fervent prayer. I hope life settles down for you as well. Giant hugs.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Sherri says:

      Ahh Marlene, I’m so sorry you experienced such an awful car crash when you were so young, no wonder it changed you so profoundly. That is scary. And a cop? Wow, that’s rough to say the least. I hope you were all okay…and thank you so much for your concern and kindness, I’m okay, but I was shocked at the time. Love triumphing over madness is my fervent prayer too, and even when we think it looks hopeless, that’s what we need to keep hold of and try to think of all that is good in the world. Giant hugs back to you 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Heyjude says:

    Just glad you weren’t hurt Sherri. And what a fab photo of you and the middle boy, what gorgeous hair he has 🙂
    As for the rest, words fail me…

    Liked by 1 person

    • Sherri says:

      Thanks Jude, that’s the main thing as annoying as this is having to deal with it on top of everything else. Four years ago almost to the day a man in a white van drove into the back of my old, previous car (which my brand new one replaced in September), causing me further whiplash on top of the original whiplash injury I had from a woman smashing into the back of hubby’s car only 6 weeks before on the London to Brighton road, writing it off. We had just picked up middle son from Heathrow after a visit to California. Three accidents in four years, nothing before that since I was 17. And none my fault!!!!! Speaking of middle son, thank you, yes, love his hair, he sometimes wears it in a ponytail 🙂 And we’ll leave the rest… xx

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Annecdotist says:

    Take it easy, Sherri, so glad you weren’t hurt and that photo with your son and the sparkly cake brings a bit of brightness into this crazy world.

    Liked by 2 people

  5. susancarey says:

    Sorry to hear of your accident, Sherri. That must have really shaken you up.

    I saw the video on Russell Howard’s show. Very moving and one can see the little boy struggling to grasp the whole senseless concept. I have recently subsribed to the Daily Optimist to counterbalance all the horrible news that is poured over us!

    Liked by 2 people

    • Sherri says:

      Thank you so much Susan. I don’t blame you, I think I need to do the same (I’ve never heard of the Daily Optimist!). This world is a dark place right now, we need some light and hope where we can get it…

      Like

  6. Yes, I also saw the video on the news channel. What a brave little boy and his dad too. I wish we knew what the answer is to this insanity and terrible plague of violence which seems to be sweeping across the world. On a brighter note, I love the birthday boy photo; so happy. 🙂 Hope your car gets fixed soon. *hugs* xx

    Liked by 2 people

    • Sherri says:

      Oh Sylvia, me too, it just seems to be increasing daily. Hopefully all will be repaired soon and yes, a happy day indeed with the birthday boy, so grateful to have such precious, joyous times 🙂 Thank you so much Sylvia, hugs back xx

      Liked by 1 person

  7. Oh, Sherri, that brought tears to my eyes. Thank you so much. I have to share that video. We must all take a breath and inhale the hope of that little boy.

    And so glad you were not hurt. Great to see the photo of you and yours. Praying for you, sweet friend. ❤

    Liked by 2 people

    • Sherri says:

      Ahh Susan, thank you so much for your sweet message and concern, and yes, this video is one to be shared for the hope it gives us all. I hope all is well with you my friend xo

      Like

  8. Tom Merriman says:

    That’s a nice video, Sherri, but one that shouldn’t really have had to have been made… the world is in a crazy place right now. Keep focusing on the good,though, and we’ll get through it.
    Sorry to hear about your accident. I’ve been noticing one a day for the past few weeks, which seems weird, but I’ve also noticed how some drivers seem to be in worlds of their own so it isn’t really surprising. Hope you get the repairs sorted out really quickly.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Sherri says:

      Yes, you’re right Tom, it should never have have been made. Thank you so much that’s very kind of you and your well wishes. And I agree, I thought it was just this town, we’ve had road works for months and it seems to have made people extra careless on the roads. Perhaps it’s the time of year, people not concentrating…we all need to keep watch and keep safe. Hope you’re having a good weekend.. 🙂

      Like

  9. dgkaye says:

    Sherri, this was such a touching post, as we all are wondering what the heck is going on in God’s world. I don’t like to get into politics on the web, and I know how American’s feel about their right to bear arms, but maybe the screening process has to be changed, and IMO, if bearing arms for personal protection requires a hand gun, so be it, but why does everyone have the same opportunity to purchase a.k.a.’s and the likes? In Canada, we aren’t allowed guns, and I’m fine with that. Hunters must apply for licences for the gun and the hunting. There’s a widely used phrase, ‘Gun Control’ and it should be revisited. It’s heart-breaking to keep watching the news without a week going by and hearing about more innocent lives taken.
    I’m sorry to hear about your car Sherri, but gratefully you’re ok. I can tell you that bad drivers seems to be another epidemic, especially in my city. Let’s think positive and pray for peace everywhere. ❤

    Liked by 1 person

    • Sherri says:

      Hi Debby, thank you so much for sharing your thoughts and your kindness. Bad driver’s epidemic seems to have spread, I thought it was just this crazy town!! I hear you with not wanting to get into politics here, I hesitated at first about this post hoping that I wouldn’t be drawn into a debate about gun control and the right to bear arms, as that isn’t what this post is about. It’s the same in the UK as in Canada, and what I knew, but I had to get used to having a gun in the house living in California with my now ex who always kept one for protection (and he was a registered Peace Officer), but we also had a neighbour who was a known drug addict and criminal with mental health issues who used to shoot a high powered rifle from his roof (right next door to us, when my three chidren were just babies) and got away with it time and time again. We lost our home because of him. It’s a mercy he didn’t kill anyone.. we got out of Dodge before giving him the chance, and to this day I wonder what kind of weapon arsenal he kept. I never understood how he and others like him, were/are allowed to keep a.k.a.’s and such. We can only hope and pray that our friends and loved ones in America are kept safe and that somehow, a solution can be found. And then there’s the rest of the world…I’m praying for peace with you Debby ❤

      Liked by 1 person

      • dgkaye says:

        My gosh Sherri, what a frightening experience you lived. Sometimes I think the whole world is going crazy, out of control. I’m glad you moved away for safety. I’m hoping that with all the world’s woes if we can all focus on compassion and goodwill, maybe our thoughts will spread around and re-ignite kindness, one prayer at a time. xo 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      • Sherri says:

        Thanks Debby, it was a horrible time, but so glad it’s all behind us now, and yes, focusing on praying for goodwill and compassion is a great way to start…hugs ❤ xo

        Like

  10. Amy says:

    A happy picture of your family! Hope everything is okay with you. Glad you are fine, Sherri.

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Rachel M says:

    Sorry to hear about your crash. I hope you’re not too shaken. That video is wonderful. Thanks for sharing.

    Liked by 1 person

  12. Hope you are ok after your crash, what a horrible thing to happen.
    Loved the photo of your son celebrating his birthday, you all looked so happy, which is lovely to see.
    As for the video, it was so touching, what a lovely dad to try and ease his son’s worries, and he is right, 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    • Sherri says:

      Thank you so much Judy, I was skaken at first but okay now, more annoyed than anything else, but thankful it wasn’t worse. I loved sharing that happy, fun photo, my son was putting on an extra goofy face 🙂 And yes, you can see why I had to share that video… >3

      Like

  13. Sherri, I’m so sorry to hear about your car accident, but I’m thankful you and the other driver weren’t hurt. DFD told me to tell you he’s so sorry, but relieved you’re okay.
    I remember watching that moving video on the world news, a few days after the attack. I was in tears listening to the confused little boy, who in the end, spoke such wise words. Everyone needs to see this. ❤

    Liked by 1 person

    • Sherri says:

      Thanks so much Jill, and please tell DFD the same, so kind of you both and yes, I’m grateful that neither of us were hurt. I still hear that sickening thud and it reminded me of the one I hear four years ago when a man drove into the back of my old car…at least this time I didn’t get any whiplash. I hadn’t seen the video until Luanne shared it, I was knocked for six by it and I felt just the same as you Jill. Heartbreakingly beautiful… ❤

      Liked by 1 person

  14. So sorry about your car. I do wonder sometimes if any of us are really safe anywhere.

    Liked by 1 person

  15. Norah says:

    i can’t believe you had a crash in your almost new car. Someone ran into the back of me when my car was just 3 months old; also at a roundabout. I was stationary, she said she thought everyone was moving so she just went ahead. Not much damage was done but it was a bit unnerving. And she was more concerned about her old work car than my new car. Never mind. We just let it go. I didn’t have all the extra hassle with insurance.
    The birthday celebrations look fun. Another milestone met. How wonderful for you all. Stay safe and well and look for the positives in life.
    As for the shootings and guns I don’t know what to say. It all seems so crazy and I’m pleased that, while shootings seems to be on the increase here, people generally do not walk around with guns in their pockets or handbags. I would be terrified if they did.
    I saw the interview with the little boy. I’m not sure what I think about it. I don’t know what else the father could tell the little boy in reassurance, but I think flowers and candles are a bit like wishes for protection. They might appeal to our compassion and humanity, a way of coping, of expressing an opinion and emotion. But protection? I wish it were that easy.

    Liked by 1 person

    • susancarey says:

      I had mixed feelings about the boy’s reaction too, Norah. He was obviously intelligent and old enough to understand that flowers and candles can’t physically protect us from harm. The concept of spiritual or symbolic protection was perhaps rather too abstract.

      Liked by 2 people

      • Norah says:

        Thanks for adding your thoughts, Susan. It is tough isn’t it? We want children to feel safe and to not add to their anxieties; but on the other hand we don’t want to give them false promises and illusions. I think the flowers and candles indicate that there are many more good people than bad in the world, and these items symbolize the way we can come together in peace and love to overcome the bad. Strength comes from a united effort.

        Liked by 1 person

      • Sherri says:

        Yes, many thanks Susan and Norah both for adding your thoughts and apologies Susan, I missed your reply to Norah’s for some strange reason…that’s what comes from trying to blog in bursts…and I agree Norah, the last thing we want to do is to give false promises to our children and even though as you said Susan, and I agree, the little boy obviously understood the concept that the flowers and candles offer no actual physical protection, I was so moved by the way he felt comforated by his father’s explanation. And coming together out of a universal desire for peace certainly gives us something tangible, even when at first, we feel so utterly helpless…

        Like

    • Sherri says:

      Hi Norah, and I’m so sorry you too experienced a car crash too. I had the same as you four years ago, twice as you can read in my response to Jude. And also like you, my car this time is brand new too, less than 3 months old 😦 I look at our happy family photo and do indeed think of all that is good, always wanting to share that here even when things seem so dark at times. Thank you so much for your kind concern, I do appreciate it very much. I understand your mixed feelings about the video Norah, and thanks for sharing them. That is precicesly why it moved me so much: we know that flowers and candles offer no protection even as the little boy is looking for that reassurance, but it is his innocent trust in and love for his father and the way he is comforted in that moment that it’s so heartbreakingly beautiful. The father’s message of protection to me is no different than telling our kids there is a Santa Claus or a Tooth Fairy; he knows they’re not real, anymore than candles and flowers can’t save anyone, but he just wants to find a way to bring peace to his son’s troubled heart. I know you’ll agree that the very fact that this video had to be made in the first place is devastating. I was in a bad place when I watched it and I rarely find something that grabs me so powerfully. The hope in the boy’s smile as he finds a tiny measure of comfort is what spoke to my heart…hope in each new day that maybe, just maybe, we can find a way through the madness and find a way to cope.

      Liked by 1 person

      • Norah says:

        Thank you, Sherri. I hope you are feeling a little more light this week, though there is not much improvement really with some not so good events in the UK over the past few days. I hope you have not been touched by them.
        I know what you are saying about the father’s response. And I too felt/feel devastated and overwhelmed by the reason the video was made in the first place. It was a nice way for the father to reassure the son. I guess I just feel so sad in knowing that, in reality, candles and flowers can’t fix it. I wish they could. But the unity of the people and the quest for peace is strong, and it’s from that that change will come. We’ve been singing about change and peace for so long now. I grew up on the songs. I wish songs could change the world. Songs and wishes, flowers and candles, and our voices! 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      • Sherri says:

        Our messages are crossing Norah, which means you and I are blogging here at the Summerhouse at exactly the same time…I wonder how often that actually happens! Ahh…you are very kind, thank you so much for your concern. We’ve had some very bad weather causing terrible problems for some, but for us here in the southwest not so bad, strong winds but nothing like up north. We went to a candlelight evening in a medieval village on Friday evening but it was too windy for any candles to stay lit which was a shame, but compared to what others have had to put up with, that’s inconsequential. Oh I understand and I feel just the same way as you my friend…we can but hope that change will come as human hearts make those first changes. And I thank you for your beautiful heart… ❤

        Like

  16. Denise says:

    It’s lovely to see you back, even if the circumstances of your car crash are frustrating ones – all that lovely writing time out the window 😦
    Very thought provoking post, so sad that there are people in America even saying things like if we all had guns in Europe, the Paris attacks would never have happened. I guess it must feel even closer to your heart thinking about your past life in America.

    Liked by 1 person

  17. Mabel Kwong says:

    I am so sorry to hear about the car crash. But I am so, so, so glad that you walked away from it in one piece. Very lucky. I’ve only been in a car crash once – I was in sitting in the back and someone rammed into my side of the car. Thankfully everyone in the car was okay. Repairing a car is a hassle, but there are other things to be thankful about 🙂

    It is sad to hear about these unfortunate incidents in America and around the world. Children are innocent, and it seems to unfair that they are exposed to such a crazy side of this world. The world is a strange place, but hopefully one day we can all learn to appreciate differences and realise violence is never the answer.

    Such a happy snap of your family celebrating middle son’s birthday. Such sparkling candles, love it. Sending you good summer vibes from Australia, and hope everything goes well for you 🙂 ❤

    Liked by 1 person

    • Sherri says:

      So glad you were okay in your car crash Mabel, they are not good. A mercy it wasn’t worse, for sure. Ahh…I’m loving those good Australian summer vibes, although it is surprisingly mild here. We’ve been blasted by strong winds causing mayhem for some further north, not so bad for us here in the south west. And yes, spending time with loved ones is what brings hope and joy and celebration in this otherwise mad world, helping us to hold onto the good while praying that we can find a way to end all this violence. Thank you so much for your lovely, kind wishes, and I hope the very same for you. My book will go on hold now until after Christmas, I know there is no way I can get to much before then. I hope you’re writing is going well my friend…I’ll catch up with you very shortly 🙂 ❤

      Like

  18. TanGental says:

    Hi Sherri. Bummer re the motor; never fun. And the gun stuff, what can you say really? I read a fantastic article on the history of the Second Amendment the other day and was flabbergasted that the unequivocal right to bear arms is as a result of a Supreme Court decision in 2008 (in Federal enclaves) and 2010 for States. Before that it could be constrained by local laws. The power of money and lobbying… Sad.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Sherri says:

      I’m flabbergasted too Geoff, to my shame I hadn’t grasped that, having left in 2003, but I’ve been reading a lot lately about the ‘God-given right to bear arms’. Is that part of this Second Amendment wording I wonder or something added by those who pushed for it? How can that be for those who clearly shouldn’t have access to any weapons? But then how is that determined without violating someone’s personal rights? And how many more school children and innocent bystanders have to die? I fear the power of the gun lobby…

      Like

      • TanGental says:

        The Second Amendment of the United States Constitution reads: “A well regulated Militia, being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Arms, shall not be infringed.” Thre words that are it seems ignored are the first 13 that imports the concept of bearing arms for a militia to defend the state. It’s never been an unqualified right yet that is the way in effect Heller ( the 2008 case) seems to have interpreted it. The irony in all this sickness is that the tactics employed by the NRA to push through these decisions are now bring employed in areas anathema to the Right namely gay marriage. Trouble is gay marriage does not lead to 350plus mass shootings a year. This was posted by a US friend on FB today ‘Ooh fun fact: For every time a gun in the USA is used legally in self defense, there are 4 unintentional shootings, 7 assaults or murders, AND (not or) 11 attempted or completed suicides by firearm’ and this article from a US attorney friend on the biography of the second Amendment may be of interest https://www.brennancenter.org/

        Liked by 1 person

      • Sherri says:

        Thanks for this Geoff and for the link to the article, further highlighting how muddied the waters are now that the San Bernardino shootings seem to be terrorist related rather than commited by a ‘gentle loner’ with very different motives. Those first 13 words make a world of difference to interpretation…

        Like

  19. Sorry to hear about your accident…these things happen so quickly and always, it seems, to new cars. I love the video…the father is so wise and the little boy so innocent and pure. Those words his father spoke to him will remain with him always.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Sherri says:

      So it seems…I had only one other new car 13 years ago, only two months old, forgot we had put a trailer on the back for the Christmas tree believe it or not because my ex didn’t want to scratch it, backed out of the driveway and it jack-knifed, slamming into the entire side panel. That was definitely my fault!! Thanks so much Bev, and yes, a beautiful moment between father and son…

      Like

  20. Ste J says:

    As long as you are safe, blogging can take a bit of a backseat my friend.

    It must be terrible to have the fear of sending your children to school, I think that is part of the rise of home schooling in the US, I think we need to understand why people feel the need to kill rather than just finding a simple scapegoat as the media always does.

    That is a beautiful video, kids are insightful to say the least.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Sherri says:

      Thanks so much my friend…yes, nobody hurt thank goodness. It happened so fast and with no warning…not good. And yes, it was a scary time then, but must be horrendous now for families with school children. Absolutely, finding those simple scapegoats isn’t helpful to anyone, such misinformation when taken at face value can cause even more damage. What a mad, mad world. I knew you would be moved by the video…

      Like

  21. What an absolutely touching video Sherri, thank you so much for sharing with us. It’s the little spots of brightness that bring joy to our troubled world these days. I’m so sorry to hear that your accident happened to your new car… what a disappointment. Hopefully things can be resolved quickly and easily for you!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Sherri says:

      I had to share it as soon as Luanne posted it, it’s just so moving isn’t it? Thank you so much Heather, I’m in the throes of getting things sorted out and I hope your run-up to Christmas is going as smoothly as possible, with plenty of baking underway I’m sure. Mine, I know, will be last minute as usual… 😮

      Like

  22. So glad to hear you’re okay. Also happy to read about (and see) the celebration with your son. 🙂 And I saw that video a few weeks ago…it’s lovely. I don’t know what to say about the world right now. I really don’t. ❤

    P.S. It's a small thing but I do like your blog snow. Mine showed up and I was delightfully surprised because I had forgotten about it. I guess it automatically snows every year if you don't uncheck the box.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Sherri says:

      Thank you so much Sarah, and yes, it was a wonderful weekend, looking forward very much to having all my chicks back home in the nest for a few days at Christmas 🙂
      Ahh…I know, this mad, mad world…heavy hearts…
      Let’s talk blog snow. Me too, as deligthfully surprised as you, must have kept that box checked! I love it, very seasonal, even though it’s unseasonably mild here, even the daffodils are up in some places and that’s just plain unnerving considering they aren’t supposed to be here until March…and speaking of seasonal, you’ve reminded me to change my header pic, thanks for that 🙂 ❤

      Liked by 1 person

  23. Luanne says:

    Sherri, what a relief that you are ok and that so is the ridiculous driver that plowed right into you. It’s very traumatic to be in a car accident, even when nobody is hurt. And, yes, as you know I think the boy in the video is precious, and his dad tried hard because what IS there to say about what happened? And all the children now missing a parent in San Bernardino. I have no words.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Sherri says:

      Thank you so much Luanne, and yes, you’re right, there is still shock and trauma even if not injured. I couldn’t believe it, stunned. And yes, what is there to say? He did his best and in the end, his little boy found comfort and a tiny smile. It’s heartbreaking, all of it, and I am just so very sad and so very sorry for all that happened in your San Bernardino…just no words…

      Like

  24. I also remember that day all too well Sherri. I live in a state where we have “open carry.” There is no way for us to distinguish the good guys from the bad guys. The state of our Union is precariously brittle right now with no answers on the horizon. Peace to you. May your car/insurance hassles be few 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  25. Ali Isaac says:

    Beautiful heartfelt post, Sherri. Sorry to hear about your car, hope it gets fixed soon. Glad no one was injured. Take care, and just remember that for all the violence and badness we see in the media, it’s just a minority. There are millions of people all around the world doing good things and being happy, but no one reports on that… it seems we only like to wallow in what makes us feel sad.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Sherri says:

      This is so true Ali, we always hear the ‘bad stuff’ otherwise I suppose it wouldn’t be news would it? It is so important to remember all the good…and I was so happy to spend last weekend with my boys for middle son’s birthday 🙂 Thank you so much for your lovely message and thoughts…you made my heart smile ❤

      Like

  26. I am sorry to hear about the car mishap.
    I too am struggling to keep up with blogging and hope to catch up more in the new year.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Sherri says:

      Thank you so much Elizabeth…I hope you are doing well, and I wish you a Happy Christmas and New Year and look forward to catching up with you in 2016. Keep healthy, peaceful and safe…blessings to you xx

      Liked by 1 person

  27. Charli Mills says:

    I hope you are doing better as we go into a new week! Jumping through the insurance hoops is enough to make me groan. I felt that way after we hit the deer a few months ago. Your writing is always so heartfelt, Sherri and like each of us, we are all trying to make sense of tragedy in this world.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Sherri says:

      Thanks so much Charli…hoping for a better week, a much better week! Ahh, I remember that with the deer…awful…and you understand those insurance groans, too right, such a hassle. Hoping everything will be sorted by Christmas. And yes, you know that is what I hoped to try to do, make sense of something, anything… ❤

      Like

  28. Isn’t that a bugger about your car. Wonderful though that neither of you were injured. Pain about all the red tape. I think when you get a new car you can be assured that something is going to happen to it early in the piece. I had someone go up the back of mine the first new car I bought. Only had two and took out insurance on the second as I was convinced something would happen. Of course it didn’t but if I hadn’t had insurance it would have.
    The shootings in America are just horrendous. I don’t know why they don’t just ban gun ownership. We did here and the risk of death by guns is miniscule. At least ban weapons that have no place except in an army and I have my doubts that they should be there either. I’d be very worried if I was a parent in America.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Sherri says:

      You make an excellent point about a new car Irene, and actually, in a weird, perverse way, I feel quite relieved that at least I’ve got that first ‘bump’ out of the way without having to fear the slightest scratch…although not quite what I envisioned o_O I’m glad nothing worse happened to you with your accident. And yes, it’s typical with the insurance isn’t it? The only other new car I’ve had (this is my second also) a long time ago, we’d only had it a couple of months, and I forgot about a trailer on the back, backed out of our driveway and it jackknifed into the side… I can hear the horrendous crunching sound now 😮 Thank you for your concern, I’m okay, and yes, very relieved it wasn’t worse ❤ As for Gun control, it's such a contentious issue in America, it's hard for those of us who live in countries where guns aren't allowed in the first place to understand it. Although, they got much stricter here after that horrendous school shooting in Dunblane in the 90s and I'm glad they did. I didn't realise you had gun ownership banned in Australia, that's something new I learned today. After the Columbine shootings I struggled greatly with not letting my fears for my children get out of hand…

      Liked by 1 person

  29. jennypellett says:

    See, you’re not the only one getting around late to blog posts!
    Oh, your poor car – as I said to you on my blog, women like her give the rest of us a bad name.
    However, in light of the other so much more serious and shocking items you mention here, a smashed in bumper is minor in the scheme of things. Being a parent in gun loving America must have been like living with a constant fear in the back of your mind. When are the gun laws going to change there – what has to happen? Emotive stuff, but…oh don’t get me started!
    Lovely pic of middle son with smashing Mum and step Dad. How wonderful that you all got together in spite of everything 😊

    Liked by 1 person

    • Sherri says:

      Ha! And I’m so late in replying too! 😮 Yes, she does give us a bad name. And a contentious subject for sure about gun control in America. I just don’t know what it will take and how things will change. I never did get used to having guns about the place…but, it’s good to focus on the good and it was a really lovely time with the boys in Brighton…thanks so much about the pic, it’s not often we get one where everyone is smiling!! But we do our best 😀 xx

      Liked by 1 person

  30. Beautiful photo!
    I only find peace in Jesus.
    Melinda

    Liked by 1 person

  31. Oh, Sherri, the slow-motion-with-nothing-to-do rings so true. Years ago I was in a similar accident, though I watched the other driver in slow motion slide through the stop sign and plow into my car. Even now I remember it in dream sometimes.
    Columbine was not far from our high school, and our teams had had done a practice round in debate two weeks earlier. The teacher who was killed was a wonderful, helpful man. Columbine is, for me, another of the slow-motion horrors.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Sherri says:

      Oh that’s horrible isn’t it, and something you never forget. I’m so sorry that happened to you at a stop sign Marylin, but so glad you were okay. And how tragic about Columbine, and so close to home for you and your community…I’ve read books about it and about the teacher. Such a tragic waste of life for everyone, and the siesmic ripples undulate even now…

      Like

  32. restlessjo says:

    Sorry for all your troubles Sherri. The video is so beautiful! If only we could all look at life like that xx

    Liked by 1 person

  33. A very powerful post, Sherri. Thank you so much for sharing the video. It gives so much hope. I love the words of the little boy “So the flowers and candles are her to protect us?” What magical words they are and what comfort they give.

    I was living and working in London when the July 7th attacks took place. It is a day I will never forget. I remember my niece begging both my partner and I not to travel on the underground. However, the next day, I made my usual journey by tube from Lambeth North to Tottenham Court Road. There was an eerie silence that day and not many other passengers, but it was my way of telling those responsible for the carnage of the previous day that I was not afraid and they would never stop me from carrying on.

    I’m so sorry to hear about the incident regarding your new car. I hope all is sorted out for you quickly.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Sherri says:

      I’m so glad you found comfort from the video Hugh, I did too and wanted so much to share it here for that very reason in light of all the recent horrible attacks worldwide. What a surreal and eerie experience for you that day on the tube, and how very brave of you. It is hard to imagine the underground to be so quiet. I’m so glad you and your partner were safe when those awful bombings happened, I remember that day well. Such suffering and shock. But you are right, we need to carry on and not give in to fear and terror and your actions were and are a perfect example of courage in the face of those who would try to keep us down. And thank you so much about my car, I hope so too, it’s a nuisance but so glad it wasn’t worse, there are a lot of crazy drivers out there, more than ever…we need to be ever more vigilant it seems.

      Liked by 1 person

      • I agree about those drivers, Sherri. We’ve just taken delivery of a new car and, on the first day, a van almost went into the back of us because the driver was texting somebody. Talk about dangerous driving! I could see it in slow motion but fortunately he just missed us. He then just stuck two fingers up at us as he drove past us as we turned left. I know not all ‘White Van Man’ drivers are like that, but I do think the fine and punishment for using a mobile phone whilst driving is far too low. Stick it up to £1,000 and I’m sure many would stop using mobile phones whilst at the wheel.

        Liked by 1 person

        • Sherri says:

          Oh Hugh, that makes my blood boil…I’ve seen drivers texting while driving and can’t believe they are still doing itI agree, with your fine, and more. So glad that van didn’t go into the back of your brand new car, but how appalling to give you the two fingers like that. I’ve had a lot of ‘White Van Man’ road rage, even worse since I got my brand new car…keep safe out there, it’s a mad house…

          Liked by 1 person

  34. Marie Keates says:

    The video was beautiful but I wish flowers and candles really were the answer.

    Liked by 1 person

  35. So sorry to read about your car crash, Sherri. Although not too serious it’s always scary and annnoying to have to go through repairs. I’m afraid that the repairs in the world will take longer and I am mostly concerned for the children from all over the world who are growing up in this new era of violence, much more difficult to explain than a ‘regular’ war. This season is certainly tainted with lots of sadness and emotions. Love will still wins. I wish you a peaceful holiday season.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Sherri says:

      Thank you Evelyne, but yes, I totally agree, it is the children I too worry about so very much. How will all this trauma, so constant and and so horrific, affect them? It is a deeply troubling question we all need to be asking. Difficult times, let’s hope that peace and joy reign over all as we keep our love strong. Wishing you also a peaceful holiday season for you and your family, with calm in the midst… xo

      Like

  36. Dearest Sherri:

    I did not have children when the Columbine shooting occurred, and for some foolish reason, it wasn’t until reading your words just now that I imagined the new fear awakened in parents every time they send their children to school. That’s not entirely true. I worry for my school age children every time they climb those bus steps, and shooting is not out of my imaginings, but the association between Columbine and them never occurred to me. Now, well, it is as vivid as those video clips of the children being led from their school, repeated so many unnecessary times since.

    I mourn those passed, and hope for no more needless death.

    Fondly,
    Elizabeth

    PS: I am sorry for your car crash. I hope you get your new vehicle back soon, restored to its former shininess.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Sherri says:

      Ahh dearest Elizabeth, I can only say I am so sorry that this post is one that had to be written, but I hope that ultimately, it’s message is one of hope and victory over fear. It is hard enough when we have so much to worry about with our children, and what a challenge, putting it mildly, in creating a safe, secure home so that they can walk out the front door each day with that same lack of fear. No wonder we want to wrap them up in cotton wool…and I still do, even with my adult children. Each day we are kept safe is a blessing, and I am so grateful that my car crash wasn’t worse, thank you for your sweet message. Keep safe and strong…sending peace and love… xo ❤

      Like

  37. badfish says:

    Yeah…bad guys out in the world. But the video changes everything. And from that video, I watched one of Ellen where a high school kid saves a police officer from a burning car. There is also a lot of good in the world, maybe we just hear more about the bad?

    Liked by 1 person

  38. jwuollife says:

    The world we live in; has its own dichotomy….some parts horrendous, and some parts wonderful. It’s such a shame.
    I’m happy to hear, you’re unscathed from your fender-bender x

    Liked by 1 person

  39. Sorry to hear about your car, things seem to happen at this time of year to add extra stress Sherri. There are no easy answers to the horrific crimes against innocent people. I saw this clip on Facebook and it broke my heart too. I hope you have a safe happy christmas Sherri with less stress and lots of laughs. Christmas is a hard time for our son but we muddle through.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Sherri says:

      Hi Kath, so kind of y0u to drop by at this busy time of year, thank you so much for your Christmas wishes. I so appreciate your concern, I’ve seen many near-misses while out and about on the roads leading up to Christmas due to people not paying attention. No easy answers for sure. And yes, I understand fully about your son. It’s the same for my daughter, any social situations, although we have a quiet time with the boys coming home for 5 days so we are all together and that helps 🙂 I send you and your lovely family a very Happy Christmas and New Year, filled with joy and love and laughter and peace. Hugs to you… xo

      Liked by 1 person

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